Headlines: The headlines on this bulletin were not particularly strong, and unlike previous weeks, there were no good quotes. The first headline shot of the word 'School' painted on a road was not a particularly good choice because the first shot of the headlines should be the strongest of the whole bulletin, and so it gives the viewer the impression that the bulletin was not going to be very interesting.
The script for the first story was extremely confusing. When giving feedback on this bulletin, Brian stated that in the future we need to ensure that there is only one thought per sentence in order to keep scripts simple for viewers to follow.
Schools: Throughout this package Louis used good GVs that were safe under section 8, which was very well done. There were a couple of criticisms of this package, one of which was that Louis gave too much exposition which was confusing to follow as a viewer. The other criticism was a grammatical error, that Louis said " the council are" instead of " the council is". I thought it was good that Louis remembered to have his interviewee's facing opposite directions from one another.
Tazer: Much like Flick's piece in the last bulletin, George did not have an easy task when reporting on this story. I thought that the link to George's piece was extremely well scripted. George did well to find relevant shots, and in particular to have the image of the tazer itself. He also looked professional by pretending to look at his notes during the piece. I felt that George did the piece perfectly, but that perhaps it would have been better if it had just been a written piece.
Hosepipe Ban: There were some very big technical problems in the first shot of this piece, in particular the colour balance and the clarity of the shot. It would also have looked better if she had been walking whilst giving her piece to camera. The second shot was much better. The interview was framed well with the perfect eye line. The only criticism of the interview would be that the interviewee should have been looking right to left. There was a good graphic piece in this package.
Eco-homes: Similarly to Louis' piece, there was a bit too much expo in this package. The interview with Cllr Ian Tait was quite well framed but needed to be tighter and his eye line needed to be a big higher. In this package Dan used the line "the future looks green", which was not appropriate for a news package - Dan should only give facts.
Parking: Graham's interview with Cllr Godfrey was very well framed, but was not particularly strong as most of what Godfrey said was fact. Although Graham did get a good quote from him of "it's a very simple system once it's set up" - but this was really all he needed to say. The interview with Cllr Kelsie Learney was good, and in particular Graham did well to start with himself and Learney walking along talking. The interview was well framed and he got a good quote from her of "thin end of the wedge." Graham's piece to camera was quite good and was well placed in a car park, although there was a beeping in the background; however this may be because the beeping was continuous, or there was not enough time to wait for it to stop.
Sport: Once again there is very little to say about the sport as it is continually produced to a very high standard.
And finally: Flick's piece about the Lego castle was perfect for an 'and finally' piece. The drop intro was professional and a good way to engage the audience. Flick's script was very strong as she answered the questions of who, what, where, why and when in her summary introduction. The interview with Duncan Titchmarsh was not particularly strong as he mainly stated facts about his job. His quote of "people think I'm a bit mad" was the only part of the interview that really needed to be included. Flick's second interviewee was also not very quotable, and looked at the camera during his interview, although this was not Flick's fault. I thought that the microphone made out of Lego was very funny and Flick's sign off of "brick by brick" was perfect for an 'and finally' piece.
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